Ecstasy?

I kept walking in the restless night
My shadow went ahead of me in the tranquil light
My mind was fidgety, yet I was composed

At least that was the way I posed.

I kept walking with the gun held tight
My head on my shoulders sat upright
My figure was statuesque, yet I was excited
For my soul within was fumed & ignited.

I was confident that I was right
But the whisper around was too quiet
It was melodic no longer, yet it was bold & strong
For a moment I felt I might be wrong.

I could not keep off my mind that sight
I had run fast to avoid a fight
But I was passionate, young & immature
Now I could be genteel but not pure.

Life around me was only black & white
I walked fast to escape the plight
My belief had changed, fear was an insistent presence
It was worthwhile to endeavour nonsense.

I felt within myself a strength & might
Had I reached tolerance’s height?
The air was breathy, my mind was daisy
Could I define this moment as ecstasy?